She is in my trunk
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
not ubering you a puppy
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
