i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
