Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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