Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
