i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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