RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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