Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
