Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
