btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Floor bacon is actually really good
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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