So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Randomize
