I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize