hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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