Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I think my moral compass just broke
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
