He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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