I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I intend to get homeless drunk
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
