I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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