when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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