I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
