beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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