doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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