I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You're like the curious george of whores
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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