I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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