Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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