Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
