I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize