I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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