I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
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