Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
