Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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