He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Randomize
