i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
