u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
