he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
