I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
