it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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