I want to make a zoo with you.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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