Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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