question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize