he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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