guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
