we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize