do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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