i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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