I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
