I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
