wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize