We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
