Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
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