Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Randomize
