guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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