are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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