so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize
